Monday, March 22

spare tyres and power lesbians

Nice. Radio Guy decided that because he was like 'Jack the Porky Middle Aged Bloke' off the Change 4 Life adverts, I must be like the orange, spare tyre bellied floozy he can no longer have sex with.

TYRE!

TYRE!

I HAVE A FUCKING TYRE!

(I would like to clarify that this was a joke, although not a very funny one that I have not even half forgiven him for, especially not when followed the day after by 'are you sure you'll be able to fit out of the car? Is it 'cause you're a little bit overweight?'. Again, this is in complete keeping with the fact that we mock each other about EVERYTHING, and he has specified to me previously that he would only ever mock something that clearly wasn't true (i.e. shit radio skills, bad dress sense) so I can't really complain.. but he has no idea that it actually makes me want to induce vomiting and then hurt myself)

Screw men. When it comes time for me to settle down, a crazy 30 something businesswoman, I'm going for Tina Fey's incredibly sexy, power lesbian identical twin.

I don't think she officially has one. But I'm going to find her, if it's the last thing I do.

'twas

5 comments:

  1. AnonymousMarch 22, 2010

    I fucking love those adverts.
    It's the TVs way of telling me to go and do some exercise. When the TV starts telling you that, you know you're really in trouble.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Peridot (G+P)March 22, 2010

    She'd better have a triplet, or we can share week about.

    ReplyDelete
  3. maryhadalittlelambMarch 22, 2010

    I love this post, yes and thrice yes to the eschewing of men in favor of sexy lesbian Tina Fey clones...

    ReplyDelete
  4. kimMarch 23, 2010

    me too. i love tina fey!! i love lesbians ... at least the cute ones ... like myself.

    XXX, Kim

    ReplyDelete
  5. Hope ChellaMarch 29, 2010

    I love this! :)

    http://hopechella.blogspot.com/

    ReplyDelete

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